Thursday, May 16, 2013

Tip Toe Dance Hearts Afire: A Ballet by Spence Roper


ACT I

Scene 1

Music begins. 
Scene opens. 10 ballerinas enter, dancing on their toes.  Not actually dancing on toes, like they're not stepping on the other ballerina's toes, they're all tip toe ballet dancing. This goes on for an hour or so.
A guy enters, also tip toe dancing.  Ballerinas see this, giggle uncomfortably.  The guy gets very embarrassed, runs off stage.

end of scene 1

end of act I

ACT II

Scene 1

Music begins.
Scene opens and we see 10 ballerinas enter and they're tip toe dancing again.  Looks to be business as usual, but no, here comes the guy, also tip toe dancing again.  Ballerinas look at each other and begin to do "Is This Guy For Real?" ballet dance move. 
Then guy jumps.  It's pretty high.  Ballerinas are impressed because hey, turns out this guy is good at jumping.  
Really good.  
While jumping, guy gets run in tights.  Is embarrassed because he bought cheap tights. Leaps off stage blushing.

end of scene 1

scene 2

Music begins.
Scene 2 opens to reveal Ballerinas dancing on toes and also sticking legs in air. They're very flexible and it shows. All ballerinas are excited about the guy who jumps, even though he tip toe dances a lot and is a cheapskate when it comes to tights.
One ballerina, however, is not that impressed.  Is doing "Meh, he's just ok" dance and is not tip toe dancing at all. Other 9 ballerinas see her and all begin the "Just ignore her, she always does this" dance.

end of scene 2
end of Act II

ACT III

Scene 1

Music begins
Scene opens and we see guy, with new, much higher quality tights that only cost him a few dollars more than the cheep-o tights he had been wearing before do "face palm" dance followed by "I won't be buying cheap tights again any time soon" dance.
The 9 ballerinas see his new much higher quality tights and all become very excited, despite fact he is now tip toe dancing VERY confidently. The 10th ballerina remains unimpressed.  Guy sees this and tip toe dances enthusiastically over to her . Unimpressed 10th Ballerina sees this and begins laughter dancing but not a "I love a man who can make me laugh" dance. It's the "mean mocking laughter" dance.
Guy jumps.  10th ballerina is not impressed.  Guy jumps 3 more times.  10th ballerina does "Oh Wow, this guy is the real deal. I'm totally on board now" dance followed by "So now what?" dance.
Guy takes ballerina's hand with one hand and puts other hand on her vagina area and lifts her up over his head. Guy tip toe dances and they spin around.  Guy lowers ballerina and they pretend to kiss (because guy is very gay which is pretty common in ballet and he already had to touch a vagina so a real kiss would have been a little much to ask of him. Those guys have been through enough already).

end of scene 1

end of ACT III

end of ballet

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